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The Table
"The dinner table is the center for the teaching and practicing not
just of table manners but of conversation, consideration, tolerance, family
feeling, and just about all the other accomplishments of polite society....”
-Judith Martin
The Importance of the Dinner Table
by Angelena Ryder
We have recently begun having our dinner at the dining table again. We had gotten out of the habit of having a sit-down dinner each evening while the boys had football practice and other activities.
Our dinner has become one of the most anticipated events of our day. Even the boys look forward to it with great anticipation. Why? Because I have taken extra time to set the table with a tablecloth, napkins, and the "fancy dishes."
The fancy dishes are the ones that I have kept in the china cabinet that belonged to my mother and grandmother. They never used them even on special occasions for fear of breaking them. They are not expensive dishes or anything, just old and special looking. My youngest said to me one day, "Mom, why don't we ever use those dishes?" I pondered on that question for a moment and really couldn't think of a reason. So that evening we used our "special" dishes. I put a tablecloth on the table and set the table using the dishes. We drank out of the nice blue glasses and had the matching glass pitcher filled with ice water for refills. We ate our pudding out of the dessert dishes.
What happened? Nothing broke, the sky did not fall, and we had a wonderful dining experience. A transformation took place before my very eyes! My thirteen, eleven, and six year old sons became little gentlemen. They used great manners, saying "please" and "thank you." The conversation was light and lovely. They complimented me on the food. The same went for my husband. Hmm, was I on to something?
The next few days I cooked regular meals, nothing out of the ordinary. I continued setting a fancy table and using the special dishes, and do you know what? We could have been having hot dogs and they still showed great respect at the dinner table. No more rushing to eat supper to go and play. They longed to sit at the table with my husband and me and talk.
My father-in-law came that Sunday for dinner. I had fixed more of a
sit-down dinner than usual. He never said anything about the table setting (he is the strong, silent type) but you could tell there was a feeling of respect in the air. He is an old fashioned guy and I could tell it impressed him.
sit-down dinner than usual. He never said anything about the table setting (he is the strong, silent type) but you could tell there was a feeling of respect in the air. He is an old fashioned guy and I could tell it impressed him.
Forty to fifty years ago it was unheard of to eat in the living room, or to grab a bite to go. Time has taken away some of the most precious attributes of a family. We are always in a hurry, trying to rush right through life.
So I challenge you ladies to get out those fancy special dishes that you never use, set your table nicely, and go back in time and enjoy your family and dining experience. Do it for a week and see what happens.
About the Author: Angelena Ryder is the mother of three boys, and the wife to her high school sweetheart. She lives on a farm and enjoys the life God has blessed her with. She has a love for the Lord and for homemaking. Visit her website at www.countrylifejourney.typepad.com, or email her at appalachian@citlink.net.
Photo by Roger Kirby.