How do we understand our “irregular” person’s behaviors? How do we cope with those behaviors? How do we handle our emotional responses? How can we possibly forgive her and seek reconciliation? Those are the questions I left with you last month.
Or as in my case, “Lord, why did you give me these parents?” Or more specifically, “God, how could You have chosen this woman for my mother!”
As I grew up, I tried to understand her. In nursing school during my psychiatric training, I tried to figure her out. Later as a mental health nurse, I consulted with various professionals to diagnose her. But the answer always eluded me … until last year.
I was at a women’s conference, when a speaker said, “You were made with God’s DNA…” At first I thought it was a clever way of saying we are made in the image of God. Then I was struck with awe as her words sunk in. Within me! … within my cells, tissues, and bones is God’s DNA! His personal design based upon His very own self.
At that moment I felt extremely special, yet it humbled me to realize I mattered that much to Him. Yet as the conference continued, my mind strayed off to other things. It would be months before I thought of it again.
It happened while I was reading Loving God. Charles Colson’s words “from generation to generation” jumped off the page at me and joining those words stored months before in my brain: “You were made with God’s DNA as were the generations before you and in those to come.”
Since then I have been growing in my understanding of those few words. Then recently, while I watched a Nova program about genomes (DNA sequences), I discovered scientific proof of those words: from generation to generation.
It’s complicated, but here’s what I learned:
- Epigenomes are the “switches” or “tags” that turn on and off the sequences that make up our genes/genomes.
- Our grandparents’ actions and experiences cause those “switches” to go on and off. For example, our grandmother’s poor nutrition or our grandfather’s smoking creates changes in DNA sequencing, which can affect future generations. More and more scientific research is showing that our genes do matter from generation to generation!
- Our genes come from both of our parents plus changes in behaviors and environment—theirs and ours—yield even more tags or switches that turn off and on. Thus more changes—permanent or temporary—alter our sequencing.
Confusing? Consider this: a red-head with green eyes is born into a family with dark brown hair and brown eyes. Through genealogical research, we find that a great, great uncle was a green eyed, red-head. From “generation to generation” is not just from one generation to the next one.
The bottom line for me is that I am the result of those who went before me. I am made up of genomes of DNA, which change their sequencing for many reasons. All those genes give me my dark brunette (now graying) hair, blue eyes, 5’2” height, petite build, personality traits, talents, and skills; as well as my predisposition to diabetes and heart disease.
It wasn’t my mother and father’s parenting skills God chose for me. It wasn’t my mother’s personality problems and behaviors. It wasn’t my father’s passiveness. It was their particular strands of DNA with all of their complexities that I needed for my life.
Therefore, I am made of God’s DNA, which has mutated through the generations to yield my precise combination of genes. I am a composite of all the abilities needed for me to fulfill God’s plan for my life. I am His unique creation formed in my mother’s womb to grow into the woman He meant for me to be. I am programmed to accomplish what no one else can do. I may choose to deviate from that plan, but God made no mistakes.
At last, I was able to thank God for my parents … especially for my mother, my irregular person. In accepting them as my specially chosen parents, I am freed from the burden of anger and lack of forgiveness I’ve carried for so long. I am able to say, “Thank you, Lord, for my parents. Yes, even my irregular person.” And “I thank you, Mom, for birthing me.”
The scars from the emotional wounds are still present; but my Father in heaven is not, and never was, insensitive to my needs. He knows them better than I do. Most important, He sees me from the moment of my conception until my return to Him. He’s known what’s best for me as a toddler, a teenager, a nurse, a mother, a writer. He knows the needs of all my tomorrows!
Do you see … do you know that you are wondrously, uniquely made with the Creator’s DNA and all its sequencing from generation to generation?
David’s Psalm is speaking of us!
Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
you formed me in my mother’s womb.
I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration—what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
you know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out before you.
The days of my life all prepared
before I’d even lived one day.
Your thoughts—how rare, how beautiful!
God, I’ll never comprehend them!
I couldn’t even begin to count them—
any more than I could count the sand of the sea.
…Investigate my life, O God,
find out everything about me;
Cross-examine and test me,
get a clear picture of what I’m about;
See for yourself whether I’ve done anything wrong—
then guide me on the road to eternal life.
—Psalm 139:13-18,23-24 (MSG)
How I wish I could have prayed David’s song (Psalm 140) 50 years ago. As I was growing up, I wish I had had the assurance of God’s sovereignty and the knowledge that He was my protector. But Dear Reader, you do not have to wait 50 years like I did to understand it. You can have that assurance right now. For it is true!
You and I have only one absolutely essential thing to do: to be pleasing to Him, our Abba / Heavenly Daddy and Creator. We do not have to please nor understand our irregular person. We just have to recognize that God has been and continues to be in control no matter the circumstances of our lives. He has protected us. He has kept all of His promises.
Then as we worship, thank and praise Him, we become ready to serve Him without question … to be the person He means us to be.
Copyright © by Constance Gilbert 2008 | 0 comments
