I could feel myself breathing in and out, slowly, deliberately. It seemed so quiet, even as beautiful music played in the distant background. Everything seemed so very far away. It was only me and Jesus, or Yeshua as they called Him. How did I get here? There I sat in a Messianic Congregation, among Jews and Gentiles worshiping Jesus in a Jewish Way. I was in a place and among people that I swore I would never be! These people are all fakes! I just know it! They are trying to trick us Jews into believing in Jesus as Messiah. Or, so I had always thought and was told to believe.
Through a series of events, my heart had opened up to the idea of attending one of these places. I was hurting deep inside and seeking something beyond myself for help. Now, the leader was asking a question. Would anyone want to accept Yeshua into their hearts? Would anyone want to pray to receive Him? He invited us to pray with him. Before I knew it, I began to pray, asking this Yeshua, the One I had always rejected, to be my God and Messiah! It happened in a whirlwind, but I have never been the same!
Have you ever read the story of Naaman and the prophet Elisha? Naaman was told to do something simple to be healed of his leprosy. He was to go and wash in the Jordan seven times and he would be healed. He was actually upset, because it seemed too simple a thing! Surely, there had to be more … than this! We are given insight into his thoughts because Scripture tells us:
And his servants came near, and spake unto him, and said, My father, if the prophet had bid thee do some great thing, wouldest thou not have done it? How much rather then, when he saith to thee, Wash, and be clean? —2 Kings 5:13 (KJV)
The servants knew their master well. They knew if he was asked to do a “great” thing he would have gladly done it. The master realized his foolish reasoning, and did what Elisha said and was instantly healed! He then went on to serve Jehovah, the God of Israel!
At that moment, now many years ago, I too simply obeyed the prophets by accepting the Messiah they preached! I too was healed of the sickness of sin and healed of hate for the One who loved me so!
However, sadly I can relate to Naaman’s way of thinking. The Scripture says he wanted a great, or in Hebrew, gadol thing, in order to be healed. Perhaps he thought this would justify things to himself, and prove that he truly was healed.
As a Jewish gal, I am very familiar with the word gadol. Every Hanukkah we thank God for the miracle of the oil, saying “A great (gadol) miracle happened there!” Gadol not only means great, but also long, high, and even proud thing.
Over the years I have begun to wonder about my precious and freely given salvation. I have wondered… Did I do things right? Did I pray the right way? Do I have to do things again? In my own way I have been wondering, Was it gadol enough?
Somehow, these doubts have crept in and made me question if my salvation was great enough. Perhaps I have to do something more? That is where both Naaman and I miss the point. Just as there was nothing Naaman had to do but obey and receive the Lord’s cleansing, there is nothing that I have to do to receive His forgiveness, but simply trust in Him. It isn’t me at all!
Are you struggling like I have struggled? Have you been saved by grace, only to try now to save yourself? Maybe you wouldn’t put it that way. Perhaps you are wondering if there needed to be something longer, something higher, something other for you to be truly saved.
Sister, we were never meant to carry that burden. He took it from us at the Cross of Calvary!
Let’s lay down our gadols right now, once and for all! Let’s rest in the salvation of the Lord.
Can we pray together, my friend?
O Great God, Jehovah! We come to You in faith! You saved us by grace! There is nothing we can do, or ever need to do to deserve You! You saved us! You healed us! And we lay down our self-will right now. We know it dishonors You to not accept your free gift of love and grace! We love you too much to dishonor You! By your grace, we commit to laying down our doubts and our struggles that tell us we somehow have to be worthy of Your salvation! We know there is nothing else we need to do! It was settled the moment of time you first poured out Your love for us! We are Yours!
Now tell the Lord…
I am Yours, Oh my Beloved God, and You are mine! I sweetly rest in You right now! Oh, how I love You and the great work You have done for me! As You have said in Your Word, “It is finished!” In Yeshua’s (Jesus’) Name, Amen
Copyright © by Evonne Mandella
This post was written by...
Evonne Mandella – who has written 2 posts on Positively Feminine.
Evonne Mandella is a Jewish homeschooling mom who loves her Savior, Jesus Christ! She also loves teaching families to learn to read Hebrew and Greek in minutes with her revolutionary easy reading method found in her Read Hebrew Today and Read New Testament Greek Today series. She is married to her love and homeschools her two wonderful children. Her mission is “to make complex subjects simple to the Glory of God.” Evonne’s column, Purposeful Hebrew, is posted bimonthly on PositivelyFeminine.org.
