Just then a woman who had hemorrhaged for twelve years slipped in from behind and lightly touched his robe. She was thinking to herself, “If I can just put a finger on his robe, I’ll get well.” Jesus turned—caught her at it. Then he reassured her: “Courage, daughter. You took a risk of faith, and now you’re well.” The woman was well from then on.”
—Matthew 9:20-22 (The Message)
I want to start this testimony out by giving all the praise and glory to God. He is my healer! He is my Rock! He is my Redeemer!!! Without the Holy Trinity—God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit—this healing testimony would not be possible!!! It is because of Jesus’ finished work on the cross and His resurrection that I can even testify of this miracle.
For those of you who have known me for any length of time, you know that I have struggled with depression. What you may not know is that I have struggled with it so intensely that I have completely checked out of my life for months on end. With those times of checking out, I have felt intense guilt and shame. I have felt like I have not been the Christian, wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend that I have been called, equipped, and ordained by God to be. One thing that I had never realized before is that the guilt and shame were not from God. Dear brothers and sisters in the Lord, please take Romans 8:1-2 to heart. It says, “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.”
On Sunday, April 25th, 2010, I was attending church at our home church, The River Community Church, here in Faribault. If I remember correctly, this was either my first or second Sunday back at church after not being there since the end of November. I felt more guilt and shame about that, but again, that was not from God nor had anyone from the church made me feel that way. Everyone welcomed me with open arms, hugs, and tons of love.
Pastor Mike and Michelle Frie from Metro Harvest Church in Milwaukee, WI were visiting our church. Pastor Mike was preaching. Pastor Mike’s message was titled, “Give Thanks! … Get Victory!” I felt like his entire sermon was just for me. Isn’t it amazing when the Holy Spirit does that? He talked about how storms always have a purpose. Now hear me, he didn’t say that the storms were from God, but we are told by Jesus that there will be trials and tribulations in this life, but not to lose heart because He has overcome the world. He went on to give us three principles for hope to believe and faith to succeed during these storms:
- Judah (praise) will triumph over his enemies.
- It’s not your battle—it’s His battle.
- Believe and succeed. When you have done all to stand, continue to stand firm! Ephesians 6:13-18 talks about the armor of God. Put it on daily!
At the end of the service, there was an altar call. Pastor Mike asked people to come forward who needed healing. I strongly desired to be free of this disease that had kept me from living my life for my King. I jumped out of my seat and was the first one at the altar. Dawn was right there ready to pray for me. She asked me if she already knew what I was coming forward for prayer for. I said yes. She began to pray for me. She rebuked the lie that prayer doesn’t work. This, of course, would be a lie that I would have to watch out for because I have been prayed for countless times before. The amazing thing about this is that during worship I felt led to get on my knees. As I was singing, I felt God leading me to pray, and I asked Him to show me His truth and help me to renounce the lie that said that I would never be healed because I had gone up for prayer before and nothing changed. This is exactly what Dawn prayed about.
PRAISE GOD!!! As Dawn was praying for me, Pastor Mike said, “There is a woman here 35 years old or younger who has been struggling with depression. God wants to heal you of the chemical imbalance today.” I just turned 35 in October. This is the last thing that I heard him say because I began wailing. It was such a cleansing cry! Knowing that my diagnosis of depression was from a chemical imbalance, and armed with the scripture from Romans 8:1-2, much guilt, shame, and condemnation was left at the altar at the foot of the cross. I was not nor am I a terrible Christian because I couldn’t defeat depression with my faith. This is another lie that I had chosen to believe.
God freed me on this day not only from the dreadful disease, depression, but he also removed the shackles of guilt and shame. He removed lies from my sub-consciousness. As He brought them forth through prayer, we were able to stand against the lies with the truth of God’s Word. I now walk in freedom knowing in my heart that my daddy in heaven loves me not because of what I do, but because of what Jesus did for me on the cross! Thank you Jesus!!!
Follow-up Post: Standing Firm
Copyright © by Stephanie Gulland | 0 comments





